Is being online 'chatting' whilst in a relationship cheating?

[Arria]

@ Ozme: I don´t argue that there are not other sorts of neglect, but that is not the question in this thread...

Neither was the amount of time spent watching porn the question... but the difference between watching something one-sided, and _interacting_ with people.

We call that comparing apples with pears :-)

And I do not oppose when one partner does not want to know something - I function that way myself -, but the pseudo-good self-justification of the "as long as my spouse does not KNOW it, I am not taking anything away from her - but I did not bother to ask her opinion on that matter before I took up the action in question".
That is false/cheating, imho... and not even having the guts to admit to such cowardice is a turn-off for me, and takes away any respect I might have had for such a person.

And, independent of the gender, I find it truly sad if one suffocates his/her partner so much that the partner has to lie about his activities.
Equally sorry am I for people who are so unhappy in their relationship that they use either chatting or golfing as an excuse for not having to spend time with their spouse (as opposed to "chatting or golfing for fun/because one enjoys it"), and don´t have the guts to speak up about that fact and communicate their unhappiness.

Still, I cannot help but wonder why you bring up non-sexual activities/pastimes in such threads again and again.
There IS a difference.
If the thing is not sex-related, the partner will feel only neglected.
If it IS sex-related, the partner will feel both neglected AND cheated upon.
Neither is good.
But they are two different things.