Quote Originally Posted by fetishdj View Post
I think the problem here is that she wants to please him as well as him pleasing her but suspects he is not getting as much out of the relationship as she is and that concerns her. He may enjoy submission but if his submission comes at a cost where he loses his sexual pleasure as a result?
*laughs* Thanks, fetishdj, but his lack of sexual pleasure isn't a worry *smug smile*. I know how to please him that way- a man's cock just can't lie. It's the other, regular life stuff I'm worried about.

The point of journalling is that some subs feel more confident expressing themselves in writing than they are verbally. You are clearly more confident in verbal communication (many women are, especially when it comes to talking about feelings) but many men don't like entering into an intense conversation about emotions because it is a battle they never win (and, yes, I know it is not a battle, at least not to a woman's PoV but it is endemic in the male psyche to see everything as a challenge and things which threaten to burst thier ego should be avoided).
LMAO, do I have your permission to quote this?

So, sometimes, a written journal can be beneficial because it allows more honest and open sharing of feelings. Also, you can get a deeper level of reflection and consideration when you write about something a short while after it is done than you can talking about it immediately and the Dom/me who reads the journal has more time to consider and reflect on it.
Yes. My little one hates to talk. I have spent our entire relationship training him to communicate (which does not always include talking; we have lots of body signals and such that have clear meaning for us, also). I think this is just the next step for us, and a journal is at least worth a try. He's chosen to write me letters about particular issues in the past, and that worked well, so I think I will try this idea.

I've also tried "pointing out stuff immediately when it happens" training technique, which worked rather well yesterday. I had to interrupt our entire conversation in the middle of shopping to focus on it, but I think it was worth it. He got my point, apologized, and then I let him try again. Then he smiled. : P So we will see.