Wow, everyone, thank you so much for your responses! Haha, believe me, we have communicated with each other, at length, about this. He knows what I want (blunt honesty) and I know what he wants (to always give me what I want). I think it's just a matter of putting into practice what we talk about (not so easy). I am always trying to understand him better; though I've had "bottom" partners before, he is the first truly submissive person I've ever been with (and I hope the only *cute face*); it's ingrained in him like his fingerprints. He's told me exactly what most of you have said, but it still made me smile to see that so many others have been in the same shoes; sometimes just knowing other people go through similar experiences makes you feel better about them. The lollipop story describes it exactly, thank you, doe.