I always do this and have done it all my life in all relationships... and I am not just talking scene ones here. I tend to dislike making decisions and prefer to make others happy rather than myself. I don't think I have got so bad as you describe - where someone does something to me sexually because they think I like it and I think they like it but neither of us do - but I can see it getting to that point if I am not careful sometimes.

This is one reason why I am in favour of 'non scene' time in a relationship -a period when you are not 'in role' and so can talk freely without consequences. Even in a 24/7 relationship when you are, in theory, in role all the time, you still need time to communicate honestly. Not sure it would necessarily help in your case (because I know this desire to please is more of a visceral thing - I do it automatically without thinking about it sometimes) but maybe a time to reflect on actions and desires for your sub may be beneficial. It may also be worth sitting down as a couple and doing lists of 'things you like' - seperately, in different rooms so neither of you can influence the other - and sharing the results. Even if you have already done this in the past, you may find that things have changed.