Why do many BDSM people look down on switches?

[TheseDays]

Well some people (not me) believe that if you are a Dom you are a Dom and if you are a Sub you are a Sub.

I think it just comes down to the idea that, if someone "submits" to someone and gives up control then they must be in that "mindset" and I *guess* people feel if that is the case then they can't get into the "Dominant" mindset.

^-Ramblings by me and reflect my view on the above

[thir]

Well some people (not me) believe that if you are a Dom you are a Dom and if you are a Sub you are a Sub.

I think it just comes down to the idea that, if someone "submits" to someone and gives up control then they must be in that "mindset" and I *guess* people feel if that is the case then they can't get into the "Dominant" mindset.

^-Ramblings by me and reflect my view on the above

Yes, I guess so, but it is confusing, isn't it? I mean, how to explain us? What do they think happens?

Maybe it would be more practical to ask people here?
How far does your submission go - if you are submissive. Devotion? Need to please? Other?
How far does your need to dominate go - if you like to dominate. Own? 24/7? Bedroom? Some people but not others?

Are your needs different than above?

Things have changed for me, but in my time I have been far out on both ends: At some point really really wanted to be owned. At some later point really really wanted to own. And some overlap, which I found confusing.

I see people who shift effortlessly and naturally, and I can only hope to learn from that.

Comments?

[Spanxyou]

Yes, I guess so, but it is confusing, isn't it? I mean, how to explain us? What do they think happens?

Maybe it would be more practical to ask people here?
How far does your submission go - if you are submissive. Devotion? Need to please? Other?
How far does your need to dominate go - if you like to dominate. Own? 24/7? Bedroom? Some people but not others?

Are your needs different than above?

Things have changed for me, but in my time I have been far out on both ends: At some point really really wanted to be owned. At some later point really really wanted to own. And some overlap, which I found confusing.

I see people who shift effortlessly and naturally, and I can only hope to learn from that.

Comments?

Have you never had a friend that you shared your intimate thoughts with,only to find out that your friend told others what you said and then you got pissed off and started giving your friend shit.Well i see being a switch like that.First you have to have the kind of personality that can change from hot to cold and back to hot again in quick time.Then you can easily be spanked,get pissed of because your partner went to the borderline of your tolerance.Then jump into the roll of dom and give it back.I am a newbe but i feel that some people like to stay in the roll of Dom or submissive,because they pride them self's with being so good at the roll they play.That it would shake their belief in them self's as a Dom or Submissive,to be play the other roll.I think a good Switch can better play the roll of Dom and sub,because they are able to understand what its like to be on the other side of the fence.In A/A the best counselors are those who have been a alcoholic,because they know the suffering involved first hand.I think if you close your mind into being one way or the other.Then you will never really be able to understand the roll you play.Its so simple.Most mean people are mean because someone was mean to them.So you learn your roll from others who were like that to you,so there for a Dom was a sub who then rebelled and became a Dom.How ever most Subs have a personality type that reflects their lives as the person who everyone else dumps on.So its easy to do what you know and there are people who dominate others in the real world.Who feel bad about that,so they want to be Dominated.A good Switch is a better Dom and Sub than either singularly.

[thir]

Well some people (not me) believe that if you are a Dom you are a Dom and if you are a Sub you are a Sub.

I think it just comes down to the idea that, if someone "submits" to someone and gives up control then they must be in that "mindset" and I *guess* people feel if that is the case then they can't get into the "Dominant" mindset.

<nods> I remember when I first felt the sub urges, I was 24 and it came out of the blue. I could not for the life of me understand what these ideas had to do with ME and the person I was! I struggled with it for more than a year, trying to think it all out. Then I realised that I couldn't. The only way was to try and see what happened. And I did, and it was good. I had had experiences with two very abusive situations (not bdsm related) and they left me devastated. And however much my bdsm situations looked like abuse, it wasn't. But I could not think my solution, I had to try it and then face the facts the experiment gave up.

Later came the dominance <G>

My point is, I believe that the people your mention here likewise try to think their understanding of Ds things. But sometimes you cannot. Sometimes you just have to accept facts. And the facts are, that understand it or not, some people do have both tangents.

I cannot claim to understand it myself, but I think it has to do with some sort of two-sides-of-a-coin. That Ds or BDSM is a whole, somehow.