New Discussion: What's an internet sub for?

[Warbaby1943]

It comes from the very old pre-Internet expression of "not having a life", which the computer nerds of old where accused of not having. It is based on a joke whether you like it or not. Here's the wiki.

I promise that the expression doesn't imply that people with on-line romances aren't having real romances.

Followed the link and still fail to see the joke or any reference to a joke. I guess we all have different senses of humor, not to mention opinions.

[TomOfSweden]

Followed the link and still fail to see the joke or any reference to a joke. I guess we all have different senses of humor, not to mention opinions.

I didn't say it was my humour. I just happen to know how the expression came to be, even though it isn't covered in the wiki. The wiki aptly explains it's usages

Online

The abbreviation RL stands for "real life", with the meaning "not on the Internet." For example, one can speak of meeting in RL someone whom one has met in chat or on an Internet forum, or of an inability to use the Internet for a time due to "RL problems".

See? It doesn't imply anything other than that RL is not on the Internet. There's no implicit judgement made about people using the Internet.

[Warbaby1943]

I didn't say it was my humour. I just happen to know how the expression came to be, even though it isn't covered in the wiki. The wiki aptly explains it's usages



See? It doesn't imply anything other than that RL is not on the Internet. There's no implicit judgement made about using the Internet.

I read it already from your link. You implied or out right said it was joke. I still don't see the joke whether it is your humor or not, I see no joke even implied in these definitions.

Since we are well off topic talking about a "joke," or lack of one, I won't bother with any more replies unless I feel it address the subject at hand which is "What's An Internet Sub For?" To me my sub is part of my real life and fills a gap of what is missing in my off line life. And she fills it nicely with love and submission that makes us both happy. Bottom line, that is all that is important, being happy with your circumstances.

[TomOfSweden]

Bottom line, that is all that is important, being happy with your circumstances.

I'll drink to that.

I did some more thinking, and I've distilled my question a smidgeon.

To me chosing slavery in the BDSM world is a very serious and deep comitment based on love. From your earlier posts Warbaby, I'm guessing that you have the same view.

Maybe I'm a superficial crud now, but how do you know it's love without ever meeting? Isn't love a to a large extent a very physical thing?

I had a discussion with my slave about this and she is a self-proffesed "expert of Internet dating". She's done it a lot, way more than me. And she said, (which I whole-heartedly agree with) "No matter how much and long you've talked to somebody on-line. Finally meeting them IRL is like meeting a new person".

This is the whole essance of what I've been trying to say. How can two people have that level of commitment, trust and love without knowing how they will be physically. Words is only one of many human ways of comunicating.

I'm hoping that this is just one more thing I need to learn, that I can blame my naive youth for not understanding. I am a nosey bastard aren't I...?

[fantassy]

"No matter how much and long you've talked to somebody on-line. Finally meeting them IRL is like meeting a new person".

Perhaps this is where the disconnect is occuring in your understanding of online relationships. You are basing your judgments on the premise that the relationship will eventually become F2F (thanks Sir Russell). I really don't care if Brosco F2F were like a different person (which I don't concede) because I am having a relationship with online Brosco. And online Brosco fulfills my needs. He listens to my woes. He celebrates my triumphs with me. He lets me vent my frustrations. We debate, we tease, we pick each other's brains. He is there to greet me at the end of every day. We are able to complete let our emotional communications shield drop (perhaps because the nature of online in itself provides a kinds of shield), something which I have trouble doing F2F. As pointed out, much of sex is mental, so the mental connection and D/S which occurs during our sex play makes it a fantastic sexual experience. After a year of this online relationship, I can only say good things. It allowed our mental and emotional compatibility to be the centerpiece of the relationship rather than physical attraction. In F2F, issues would arise than might make us incompatible, but online they don't matter. Example: he smokes a lot - I'm allergic to smoke; he drinks more than I think is wise; my apartment is a pigsty - he likes an orderly place; I am a workaholic - he's semi-retired. The key to an online relationship is compatibility and you cannot discover you are truly compatible unless you are intellectually and emotionally honest with each other.

I guess to be completely honest in this post, I do have to mention one need online relationships cannot fulfill - and that is the need for human touch. The mere comfort we derive from being warm bare skin to skin cannot be acheived online. But hey, nothing in life is perfect.

fantassy

[cariad]

I really don't care if Brosco F2F were like a different person (which I don't concede) because I am having a relationship with online Brosco.

Wow - it is so obvious when you put it like that. A great post fantassy, and has certainly given me food for thought.

cariad

[Warbaby1943]

Perhaps this is where the disconnect is occuring in your understanding of online relationships. You are basing your judgments on the premise that the relationship will eventually become F2F (thanks Sir Russell). I really don't care if Brosco F2F were like a different person (which I don't concede) because I am having a relationship with online Brosco. And online Brosco fulfills my needs. He listens to my woes. He celebrates my triumphs with me. He lets me vent my frustrations. We debate, we tease, we pick each other's brains. He is there to greet me at the end of every day. We are able to complete let our emotional communications shield drop (perhaps because the nature of online in itself provides a kinds of shield), something which I have trouble doing F2F. As pointed out, much of sex is mental, so the mental connection and D/S which occurs during our sex play makes it a fantastic sexual experience. After a year of this online relationship, I can only say good things. It allowed our mental and emotional compatibility to be the centerpiece of the relationship rather than physical attraction. In F2F, issues would arise than might make us incompatible, but online they don't matter. Example: he smokes a lot - I'm allergic to smoke; he drinks more than I think is wise; my apartment is a pigsty - he likes an orderly place; I am a workaholic - he's semi-retired. The key to an online relationship is compatibility and you cannot discover you are truly compatible unless you are intellectually and emotionally honest with each other.

I guess to be completely honest in this post, I do have to mention one need online relationships cannot fulfill - and that is the need for human touch. The mere comfort we derive from being warm bare skin to skin cannot be acheived online. But hey, nothing in life is perfect.

fantassy

Thank you fantassy. So much of what you say I live.