When I asked my lover/master if he would train me (I've mentioned before that he has much more BDSM experience,) he said that he had already started.&nbsp; We are long distance, so when we are apart, I try to help the process by reading-not porn type, but educational BDSM books, and by spending a lot of time on this site. I am sure there must be other good sites out there; I just haven't gone looking for any yet.&nbsp; Yes, His training will be specific to the two of you, but, especially since he has given permission to speak with other Doms, I would double check about talking to subs as well, then spend time here.&nbsp; Lots of people here are very helpful-denuseri has already offered you some of her advice, and while she is exceptionally literate, she is, fortunately, the norm, not the exception, in her desire to help.<br>&nbsp; I, too, hope that you find happiness, whether with this master or with a r/l life one.&nbsp; But, from one low self-esteem to another, please don't let your sense of worth depend entirely on any one person but yourself. Any relationship can end; you need to learn to love yourself all the time.&nbsp; I know it is hard--I am still working on it--but please try.&nbsp; I, for one, applaud your courage in trying this lifestyle out, and in asking for help and advice from others. To avoid misunderstandings: I am not saying that you cannot take pride in serving your master well, just that I hope you can learn to take pride in being yourself well, too.&nbsp;