Quote Originally Posted by thir View Post
I do not know what you mean about 'normally' - as was said, there is one dead man per day from domestic violence, methinks that's a lot of people!

If you assume that mental violence is happening a lot more than that, then there is something wrong with relationships in general, I'd say. And maybe there is. If you have a power balance based on society backing men and men being stronger and women talking better, and you then take away the society backed power balance and the right to violence, then what is left?

Mutual respect and love seems to be out, according to this. Is that really true?
I had better explain what I am talking about. When men talk about these things with other workmates etc, they usually say things like: - my wife is getting on my back 24/7, my wife is always nagging me, my wife is always giving me headaches because of her constant nagging. In the end this verbal abuse that a woman [not meaning to be sexist] is so very damn good at, effects his work. The more he lets her get away with the abuse the more she thinks it is a sign of weakness. I know from experience with my first wife that this assault on a man’s mind is tiring and painful. The point is that very few men in this position fight back with physical violence even if the man knows he is far superior in strength. Yes, it is a mixture of values and it gives the mental abuser the wrong impression.

If a wife punches a man in an argument on the arm very little is said about it, because in most cases the male through work is built differently. Most shrug it off as part of the argument and nothing more is said about it. The same with a slap around the face, one slap and it will hurt, but on the second most men will catch the hand and again that is as far as it goes. Very few men will talk about these types of physical abuse because to them it is not.

The wife on the other hand if slightly punched on the arm by any man will in most cases inevitably bruise. Within ten minutes the neighbourhood knows and the man is now a wife beater, and even if he accidently bruises her while defending himself, the act is now domestic violence. Yes, the scales are tilted once more because the man very rarely admits that he is the one being physically abused. If he did and was a big strapping builder, what policeman is going to believe him, or for that matter what judge?

Be well IAN 2411