How effective is it to really train online?

It depends exactly on the relationship dynamic between the dom/me and sub in question. Personally I have found it to be a two way street. The limitations involved are only dependent on the individuals perspective to overcome them. Though I must admit the overbearing "presence" that a real live dominant can display is for the most part absent, I have seen some dominants exert a close equivalent on line.

How can you tell who will be a good Dom/Master?

Mostly for me its based on exactly how they interact with me, intuition plays as much a part as objective observations conserning things like how patient a dominant is, or how understanding and knowlegable they are during our interactions.

Is it rude or bad to refuse an order you do not think you're ready for or do not trust the 'Dom/Master' enough for? Or even for just something you think you should wait awhile before doing it? (such as sending nude pictures over the internet)

Absolutely not, in fact it is they who are being "rude" in the first place for asking for such.

Do you have any advice for a new Submissive, trying to find herself?

Map quest is not the answer so much as finding your own center. In fact a really good friend of mine from online that has mentored me in some aspects conserning the finding of my own submission has and excellent passage from some books that she and I are fond of that sums it up far better than I ever could:

"Do you know, ultimately," I asked, "who will prove to be your one best trainer?" "No, Master," she said. "You, yourself," I said, "the girl, herself, eager to please, imaginative and intelligent, monitoring her own performances and feelings, striving lovingly to improve and refine them. You yourself will be largely responsible for making yourself the superb slave you will become."
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