Quote Originally Posted by shayna View Post
In real life its a lot harder, you have to put yourself out there, and its a 50 50 shot. Believe me its happened to me before, where i had a boyfriend ( i actually still work with him *Sighs*) and i had to tell him, 'look i want you to tie me up, spank me and call me a dirty slut" he didnt take it to lightly.. I didnt say it in that way but that was what i was thinking lol. I was embaressed becuase he thought i was weird, and or strange. So i broke up with him a few months later becuase he didnt take heed to my advice. I cannot have a vanilla relationship anymore, it just doesnst work. *shrugs* that god for internet!
I agree, it is a tough conversation to have in r/l. And usually it ends badly. Before my Master and I got together, I had confessed my desires to 3 previous boyfriends, and a few "would-bes". You're right- they all looked at me like I was a wacko. (This was between the ages of 13-18, btw.) Because of my honesty with the first boyfriend at 13, I was outed to my entire jr/sr high school AND all the faculty AND my parents, their spouses, my grandparents etc. It was a nightmare. BUT- even taking ALL that into consideration, I still think meeting in r/l rather than the internet is best. When you meet a person online, 9x out of 10, the most discussed topics before becoming a couple are relating to sex, s&m, D/s, etc. There is often little to the relationship except those aspects. I am only speaking from my experience here, but my experience really is considerable because all of our poly relationships and many, many could-have-been poly relationships started online. Even though we always made it a policy to try to get to know the girls beyond these levels, AND even though we quickly progressed from online to r/l with them, the relationships were very shallow and hollow by comparison to the relationship my Master and I share. I don't mean to upset anyone or be judgemental of other peoples' relationships. I just feel that the internet is NOT all it's cracked up to be when trying to establish anything more than a friendship. Even then, it's chance-y. JMHO.