amen, i believe you've got it, safety is key and patience is a vertue, both even cliche as it is are correct. it's a good thing i don't mind listening. i've found every girl loves that. how else am i going to know whom i am talking to and what they like, as much as i would love to be able to read women's minds , it's not possible, so asking the questions of personality , likes and dislikes, i can gear bdsm ideas around that to the enjoyment of the submissive. but i still would just love to be to the point about it. even the patient aren't always, sorry. still this thread has been a good one. would love to hear/read more.