Bottling up anger is the quickest way to resentment, and when it comes to being submissive, resentment leads to guilt and self-loathing, because "I shouldn't feel that way!"

I think, in the end, it boils down to respect. My husband respects me enough to care when something He has done (inadvertantly or not) upsets me. I respect Him enough to put forth the effort into communicating that anger in a way that is not unhealthy- I've never been one for confrontation, but I was raised by two extremely passive-aggressive people and it's something I have to watch out for. He helps me with that, knowing that communicating anger isn't easy for me.

Communicate, for sure! Just do it respectfully. This means that you should never agree that something is resolved unless you really feel that way, and once it's been resolved it needs to be put to pasture. You know all the pitfalls there, I'm sure, with not bringing up the past as a weapon and the like.

Besides, a good Dom will want to know what makes you angry. It gives the Dom a better understanding of you. This ultimately leads to better sex. And better sex makes the world go 'round.

Oh yeah, it also leads to better communication and stuff.