Quote Originally Posted by Demon Dom View Post
Why must restraints and pain be employed to elicit submission in a satisfying way for most Dom's?

Assuming you understand that there are people in our community you can do without…

Because restraints and pain are necessary to elicit submission in a satisfying way for most submissives.
IMO, there are two classes of restraint+pain in D/s. There's what you do to train and to enforce training, because not all submissives can or want to respond to purely mental dominance. And there's what you do not because your sub needs to be punished, but because you enjoy doing it.

The second kind is sometimes classed as SM and distinguished from dominance, but I experience it as D/s and most of my subs do too. Simply, the most basic and instinctive expression of power is that I can hurt someone and they have to take it. (Every abuser and rapist understands this.) Most subs, even if their obedience is perfect and their performance faultless, need to be tied up and/or hurt now and then, just to remind them where they stand.

Of course, I'd do it anyway, but it's nice to know it's good for them