Lost and confused?

[Euryleia]

1.) Do all dom(me)/sub relationships have humiliation and demeining name calling or is it possible to have this type of relationship without that.

Of course it is. Every relationship is built on what works for each of the participants. If you're not into humiliation or name calling, then that's a hard limit for you and should be respected by your Dom/me. While I might call my girl some names, they all are prefaced by the word 'My' because I am proud of her and proud that she is mine. I value my possessions too much to degrade them.

2.) How far do you have to go I understand that there are hard limits and soft limits but If your not comfortable with thing you may have seen or found does that mean this is not for you or can you stay in the kiddy pool so to speak?

Most hard/soft limit questionaires have a ranking of interest and willingness. For example:

NO means you will NOT do that item under any circumstances (a hard limit).

0 (zero) indicates you have utterly no desire to do that activity and don't like doing it (in fact, may loath it) and would ordinarily object to doing it, but you would be willing to do it to please the Dominant if it they really wanted it. (sometimes called a "soft limit").

1 means you don't want to do or like to do this activity, but wouldn't object if it were asked of you by your Dominant.

2 means you are willing to do or try this activity, but it has no special appeal for you.

3 means you usually like doing this activity, at least on an irregular/ occasional basis.

4 means you like doing this activity, and would like to experience it on a regular basis.

5 means the activity is a wild turn-on for you, and you would like it as often as possible.

There are many sexual activities that I hadn't even heard of much less wanted to experience. With open and honest communication between you and your partners, you can let them know about your fantasies and what you think might like to try and what activities should be tabled until you've developed a better rapport. By no means should you jump right in to the deep end. Enjoy the water while you hold onto the edge and, as you increase the trust, you can go further and further out.

3.) Is there a way to find a teacher in stead of a dom(me)/ sub

Yes, I would recommend that. Look for people whose posts you respect and respectfully approach them for advice or mentoring. Go to your local munches or events in your area and talk to people. Some of them might be willing to teach you.

These are a few of the things racing through my mind. I explored a little last night. I was at a fettish ball and had brought some friends. They weren't in it as much as I was. I met a lot of different people and had a lot of fun but I'm still blurred as to which way I like better. Anyways most of the night I was in control Flogging willing victims teasing and being amused but I really love a good spanking. So I let my composure down and allowed myself to be cropped by this fierce vixen mmm. I really wanted more so I asked to be flogged apparently I caught the attention of the main event dude so he did it for me. then he lifted my skirt and spanked the shit out of my ass he asked if he could bite me and I am a sucker for that so I allowed him. (there is a point I promise) I felt not sexual desire from this I just really enjoyed the sensations. I felt I was fulfilling curiosities conducting my own experiment if you will. He presented me with a pass to the after party but I did decline because I knew I would only want to watch I 'm not ready for participation yet. My friend was so disgusted by my display that she reemed me a new one. I came on last night and talked to some wonderful people who helped because I seriously was on the brink of tears. Thank you to all I spoke to. I didn't sleep well last night ans still kinda feel uneasy. Has or is anoyne felt\feeling like this. I obviously don't have the support I need in my immediate circle and this has become my safe haven.

Did your friend ream you for allowing someone to potentially draw blood with the bite? Someone whose health status you don't know? Other than that, I think that you going to fetish balls is a good way to meet people in the scene and to explore all that you are feeling. As a switch myself, I know that there are a ton of heady emotions from both Dominating and submitting and I hope you enjoy finding out what sensations turn you on best.

Be safe.