Fabulous thread!

I have been married 13 years. In the past, I have put all else above sex with my hubby; taking care of children, making money, schedules, problems... it all is a huge drain on a person's energy. My belief is that while marriages in most cases, are begun with love and the dream of happily ever after... life bogs us down and we take care of life's details before we take care of ourselves. If we don't have energy to take care of ourselves, how can we even think about taking care of our spouses?

My marriage is a choice I made... out of love, but also a conscious choice. My husband will always come first... luckily.. as far as BDSM... he allows me to explore what I am interested in... I do not break our vows, and I am honest with him. We are currently having the best sex of our lives... at every opportunity.

I think that people in the BDSM community are more focused on either the sexual dynamic, or the interpersonal power exchange that occurs. These types of people are not the people who allow the business of life to get in the way of their relationships or sexual drive.

I have also learned in my marriage, that it is best for ME when I lift up my hubby to others... praise his dedication to our marriage, boast about his hard work ethic, and his drive to care for this family above all else.

It says a lot about you, as a person Adriana, that you do not talk down to anyone about your hubby.

I think we are the lucky ones...