Mina says hello

[mina]

Tojo - Ahh your compliments made me smile =) Thanks for being so understanding. <3

Masters_lilone - Thank you.

Ruby - The first three safe words you gave (no, stop, and please don't), I was thinking "Yeah right... those would turn him on more!" and then I read the potty break one and started cracking up! That WOULD be a perfect safe word... talk about turning someone off lol. You know, if things really got out of control I might have to use that. I might use it anyway just to see his reaction! Thanks for the advice, much love <3

Ed - That's very cool of you to share your poem with me. I like the idea of writing poems to communicate deeper feelings and thoughts to people. I'm not sure what you were hoping I'd get out of it, but it didn't really change my mind about anything. However, that doesn't mean it wasn't interesting to read or well written. Thanks for sharing.

[Tojo]

Anytime babe.

Take care.


Tojo

[Ozme52]

Oz - While I do not have any other options (I can't imagine going back to live with my aunt and don't have money to be on my own) and wouldn't be allowed to leave anyway, I would NEVER want to leave. I love him too much. As for me willingly giving myself to him as opposed to him taking, I had already given up on life before I met him. Anything he does to me is fine. As cliche as this is, I don't know if I'd be here if it wasn't for him, honestly. I want someone to have control of my life, I don't care if that means I'm weak. I don't think he would push my limits to the point where I could seriously be hurt. He tries to maintain control, but sometimes because of his nature he can lose it. He does apologize (in his own way) later though.

This statement is one of those danger signs, clear and presenst danger. If he can't control himself... and apologizes later... but "in his own way" as you put it... You are definitely in danger of getting "battered spouse" syndrome. It will escalate in violence as you continue to make excuses for his uncontrolled behavior. If he has so much rage that he regrets it but allows it to recur, you will end up in the hospital, probably multiple times. And when he begins to tire of you... he will begin to blame you for his behavior. You need to find another option.

Sorry Mina, but that's how I see it.

[mina]

This statement is one of those danger signs, clear and presenst danger. If he can't control himself... and apologizes later... but "in his own way" as you put it... You are definitely in danger of getting "battered spouse" syndrome. It will escalate in violence as you continue to make excuses for his uncontrolled behavior. If he has so much rage that he regrets it but allows it to recur, you will end up in the hospital, probably multiple times. And when he begins to tire of you... he will begin to blame you for his behavior. You need to find another option.

Sorry Mina, but that's how I see it.

I shouldn't have used the word "sometimes". Only very rarely has he lost control, and I wasn't about to die or anything. He doesn't allow it to recur either, those were just mistakes. And by "in his own way" I meant he does something very sweet =)

Please don't worry, I'm very happy with him. I can't imagine he would "begin to tire" of me either, he is pretty obsessed with me. We have plans for marriage as well.

[Ruby]

We have plans for marriage as well.

Whoo hoo!

So, he could be the one.

Congrats, Mina.

Ruby

PS

From what I'm reading, you have found a relationship that meets your needs, wants and desires. That's a beautiful thing.

[Warbaby1943]

I'm not trying to sugarcoat anything either, I will admit that he does have anger problems (which I really don't blame him for considering his past) and VERY RARELY he will act towards me out of anger, for which he apologizes later. But I think even normal relationships are like that.

Mina,

I'm certainly no expert but this sounds like abuse to me. I did have a niece who was a battered wife and she used to say very similar things like he was so sorry after the fact. Nuff on that subject, you have to decide.

Ruby hit the nail on the head with her comments. I believe you should have a drivers license and I also think you should have some type of job. Even if it is just part time. At least you'll have a couple bucks to call your own and give you a little self esteem. Maybe that would help keep you from ever getting to as low of a point in your life as you were at 2 years ago. 16 is way too young to give up all hope. Even now you are very young to have to decide the path the remainder of your life will take.

Keep in touch here.

[mina]

Whoo hoo!

So, he could be the one.

Congrats, Mina.

Ruby

PS

From what I'm reading, you have found a relationship that meets your needs, wants and desires. That's a beautiful thing.

Thanks! I'm so excited for it too. And yes, he is definitely the one.

Warbaby - I don't really know how to respond to that, other than I disagree completely. About getting a job... it would seem very disrespectful and ungrateful of me to try to make my own money when he's already said he'd take care of me. It would be like I didn't trust him or something. He's extremely generous with his money when it comes to me and usually buys me whatever I desire if he approves, so there's really no need for me to make my own money. I do agree with you about the driver's license... I only want it in case there's an emergency though.

[Warbaby1943]

Thanks! I'm so excited for it too. And yes, he is definitely the one.

Warbaby - I don't really know how to respond to that, other than I disagree completely. About getting a job...

Mina,

Believe me in my lifetime there were/are many who disagree with me. I usually speak what I think and believe. As you know, everyone is different and has to live their lives according to their own circumstances. Look at my age and remember I saw women's lib begin.

Just be happy in what you do, that is the main thing.