If we are talking about love (or maybe just personal feelings - we don't always really love our sex partners) mind is always a determining factor.

When talking about pure domination for example like in a prison or rape - there can be physical only domination.

But whenever we talk about SM there _always_ comes the mind into play.

It starts with the agreement of both partners who is in charge. This is something both partners need to agree on - and that's where all the psychology stuff starts.

You can limit it if you are more into the physical part. But even a normal spanking is a mind game. The submissive willingly (more or less) accepts to be spanked. All the struggling and the begging to stop is just more of that mind game.

Pure domination without an psychological aspect won't be fun. Because it is nothing personal. Ok, there may be people who like just "unpersonal sex" (and our role playing games, aren't really any different from "vanilla sex", except how we do it), but these people are very very rare.


Quote Originally Posted by IDCrewDawg
I am so deeply infatuated and held by her inner and outer beauty that I sometimes feel captive in her presence. Yet at the same time I have this incredible need to have her kneel before me, to spank her, to whip her, to tie her up, and have very physical intimacy.
That is what love is about. You admire that person, you would do anything for him/her and still you dominate him/her.

That's one of the greatest mind games in bdsm I guess...